BlueEyesandStormySkies

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fuckyeahtattoos:

Done by Steve Martin at High Rollers in West Chester, PA
 www.bystevemartin.com

(Source: louyouwhore, via justcallmelazy)

leinabby808:

anus:

the scary thing about dating is that you are either going to marry that person or break up

deep thoughts from an anus

(Source: anus, via justcallmelazy)

(Source: kittiezandtittiez, via justcallmelazy)

mortychrist:

when i was 14, i proposed to this girl in my class and she said yes but our parents said we were too young to get married so we tried to do it in secret and one of my friends found this shady guy to marry us but then the girl broke up with me when she transferred schools and we never got the marriage annulled but i don’t even know if it was official in the first place so long story short, i think i might be married. 

(via justcallmelazy)

fallen-angel-with-a-shotgun:

dajo42:

if you dont have me on facebook you are probably not missing out on any posts but the comment section is important too lmao

I went to the Renaissance faire dressed as a warrior.  I had a real sword with me, too.  I was standing (in character) next to a sword-fighting ring, where kids of all ages got the chance to pick up a sword and challenge the champion.  Some woman walks by, with her little girl.  The girl starts walking towards the ring, saying she wants to fight.  But the mom pulled her away hella sharply, and was like, “That’s for boys.”  You don’t want to be a BOY, do you?”    And the girl looked around and saw me.  I think she thought I was a boy; I had my hair in a ponytail, and was wearing a hood.  So she comes up to me and asks me, “Do you think girls can be fighters, too?”  And her mom looks like she’s silently gloating.  Like she thinks I’m going to say no.  So I take off my hood, untie my hair so that it flows freely, and kneel before her.  And I’m like, “Milady, anyone can be a fighter.”  I swear, the look on that mother’s face made my day.
pulpdrinker:

i have never seen something more clearly written by a straight white male

deodrant:

you know when ur in a certain position in the car where its like wow if i get in a crash im fucked

(via justcallmelazy)

elijahkrantz:

I found out santa wasnt real because I got a spy kit that christmas so i fingerprinted my mom and matched it to the fingerprints i dusted on the milk mug i left out… Im on that next level shit

(via justcallmelazy)